I wish that the child me got to read posts like yours written by people whose families developed their own subcultures that is not 100% the same as either the generation that migrated or that of their country of birth and yet have aspects of both. That way, I would have had more language to understand my experience growing up and to remember that my identity is a story, not one national label. So I thank you for sharing this. I had no idea about the banana label being a thing!
Growing up as an Emirati of mixed South Iranian and Arab roots while attending a school where most subjects were taught in English, I have often not felt “Arab” enough but at same time never felt “Iranian” enough either as I never set foot in Iran and the southern Iranian culture is different from northern culture (there are lots of Emiratis of South Iranian, Zanzibari, Baluchi, Omani, Yemeni, Palestinian roots among many who been there for generations and have their own subcultures). While I can converse fine in Arabic, I tend to mix it with English in one sentence and revert to the latter with certain topics. I also never learned Farsi or Bastaki, (the latter a dying language parts of my family speak that is unique to parts of southern Iran). I laughed out loud at the video especially the scene with the board game, I can relate 😆
The way you speak Arabic is how a lot of us Northerners speak our Hokkien! And it is so cool to learn about your heritage. I would love to learn about the differences between north and south Iranians. North and south differences seem to be a thing; there are big differences between north and south Chinese in China for eg - they speak such different dialects, for one.
I would say there are differences in cuisine as well as certain languages and dialects and what ethnic groups dominate. Also the south used to be dominantly Sunni but the demographics may have shifted in the 70s but I’m not sure. Also cuisine and clothing is closer to the Gulf Arabic culture and not widely known in Iran or even by Iranian food lovers globally. This makes sense if you see how close the Iranian and Arabic coasts of the Gulf are to each other. This is why I connect with people who grew up in the border of countries
It's funny, at some point in our lifetimes we decide what we embrace and who we want to be. But we can never decide what other people think we are. And sometimes the things that matter most to us don't matter at all to the people we meet.
I think all sorts of people feel the "otherness" it's all over the world as travel makes the world a smaller place. I figure you just have to make friends where you can and enjoy those people who can understand you.
Yes, I no longer care what people of me, tho I always wonder why they want to evaluate how pure or enough one is according to some made up parameter. Society is weird that way!
I kinda knew which part of Fujian my grandparents were from, it was Zhao An! Where I was from in Sarawak, we have a zhao an association. Helps with tracing the roots.
There was something funny I read a while back. While I can’t retrieve the source now, it went something like the people came to Malaysia and claimed the dialect they’re speaking to represent the whole of Fujian province (calling it Hokkien), though they’re just a small family of the dialect spoken in the province. That’s also kinda the reason why southern and northern hokkien in Malaysia sounded different!
How cool! I wish I knew which association my family even belonged to! I suspect my ancestors may have come from the Zhangzhou region, as they are the ones that settled in Penang. But I guess we will never know ;)
We're so mixed in the Caribbean, I think we don't really care what the folks in the countries we're descended from say. We've basically formed our own identity, but even that comes with issues...like colourism.
It doesn't matter who we are, where we go, there will always be those who want to lord it over others through some means or the other. People, I tell you!
Sorry, I cannot let you call yourself banana if you understand some mandarin and hokkien :p growing up we only called our friends banana if they don't understand any Chinese language/dialects at all, we all can't read or write in Chinese being in a convent girl school :) nowadays I notice the younger generations do not know the Chinese dialects anymore but they learn mandarin in schools as mostly a second language. Does that make them less banana? I don't think so :) but I must say I don't feel so offended if China was being criticized, I visited there for a month once and has since decided, I still embrace my Chinese heritage in many ways, but we are really no longer the same.... I actually feel more akin to Chinese diasporas around the world, besides my fellow Chinese-Malaysian of course!
Yes me being offended with China being criticised was a mystery to me, but lately I realise it is more that I am upset over the hypocrisy and unfairness over the critiqcisms more than anything, and that there are lies being printed in Western media about them. I guess as someone who believes in proper journalism ethics this upsets me....cos it reminds me of what we go through in Malaysia as Chinese people, especially during the elections 😅
That's true. I am also aware of the power of the western media and try to also seek more alternative views, although it's tough cause I am limited to the English language, and to some extend the German language, which I seldom read for pleasure. Glad you are one of the voice to speak up and share, in English! :)
You know, former Singaporean diplomat Kishore Mahbubani says that Asians need to speak up more about this issue, and I agree. I do my part point out factual errors and encourage more nuanced thinking. It is tiring but I think if we dont, it is just gonna gwe worse.
I am actually learning to read Mandarin now, and while it is still early days, I really think I would be able to read Chinese social media by next year. Am excited!
The ex was half-Taiwanese. I assume there are slightly different factors at play, but I always wondered if he'd agree to our relationship since I am wholly Filipino (although in Taipei I was mistaken—twice!—for a local).
Also yes, agree with Rachel in the earlier comments that speaking Chinese really unbanana-fies one haha. I grew up in HK but I was a bit of a banana too as I spoke Cantonese terribly growing up (English-ed and everything) and only now at work having to converse in the language daily and gaining proficiency I've shed that skin (or rather... my pulp has yellowed??).
Speaking of hometowns, I had the exact same conversation with my dad!!! He literally just said "somewhere in Fujian" when I asked where our ancestors were from and it was only when we went back to Malaysia for Ching Ming this year did we note the exact hometown marked on the gravestones. I write about this heritage as told by fishballs over here (https://slowburnliving.substack.com/p/fishballs-a-cultural-history-and?r=2v43lk) feel free to drop by if you're interested!
I wish that the child me got to read posts like yours written by people whose families developed their own subcultures that is not 100% the same as either the generation that migrated or that of their country of birth and yet have aspects of both. That way, I would have had more language to understand my experience growing up and to remember that my identity is a story, not one national label. So I thank you for sharing this. I had no idea about the banana label being a thing!
Growing up as an Emirati of mixed South Iranian and Arab roots while attending a school where most subjects were taught in English, I have often not felt “Arab” enough but at same time never felt “Iranian” enough either as I never set foot in Iran and the southern Iranian culture is different from northern culture (there are lots of Emiratis of South Iranian, Zanzibari, Baluchi, Omani, Yemeni, Palestinian roots among many who been there for generations and have their own subcultures). While I can converse fine in Arabic, I tend to mix it with English in one sentence and revert to the latter with certain topics. I also never learned Farsi or Bastaki, (the latter a dying language parts of my family speak that is unique to parts of southern Iran). I laughed out loud at the video especially the scene with the board game, I can relate 😆
The way you speak Arabic is how a lot of us Northerners speak our Hokkien! And it is so cool to learn about your heritage. I would love to learn about the differences between north and south Iranians. North and south differences seem to be a thing; there are big differences between north and south Chinese in China for eg - they speak such different dialects, for one.
I would say there are differences in cuisine as well as certain languages and dialects and what ethnic groups dominate. Also the south used to be dominantly Sunni but the demographics may have shifted in the 70s but I’m not sure. Also cuisine and clothing is closer to the Gulf Arabic culture and not widely known in Iran or even by Iranian food lovers globally. This makes sense if you see how close the Iranian and Arabic coasts of the Gulf are to each other. This is why I connect with people who grew up in the border of countries
This is interesting. Black people who "act white" or "talk white" used to be called Oreos.
hehe is it ok to find the term oreo cute? I know people arebsensitice about such terms, but I find it endearing.
uggjh i swear autocorrect 😅
I hear you. It's not cute lol
And there’s “coconut”. Brown on the outside, white inside.
I guess any fruit that's a different color on the outside/inside works lol
Contrasting colours haha
It's funny, at some point in our lifetimes we decide what we embrace and who we want to be. But we can never decide what other people think we are. And sometimes the things that matter most to us don't matter at all to the people we meet.
I think all sorts of people feel the "otherness" it's all over the world as travel makes the world a smaller place. I figure you just have to make friends where you can and enjoy those people who can understand you.
Yes, I no longer care what people of me, tho I always wonder why they want to evaluate how pure or enough one is according to some made up parameter. Society is weird that way!
I think you are voicing the experience of many people. Changing countries and being immersed in more than one culture can be a curse or a gift.
I kinda knew which part of Fujian my grandparents were from, it was Zhao An! Where I was from in Sarawak, we have a zhao an association. Helps with tracing the roots.
There was something funny I read a while back. While I can’t retrieve the source now, it went something like the people came to Malaysia and claimed the dialect they’re speaking to represent the whole of Fujian province (calling it Hokkien), though they’re just a small family of the dialect spoken in the province. That’s also kinda the reason why southern and northern hokkien in Malaysia sounded different!
How cool! I wish I knew which association my family even belonged to! I suspect my ancestors may have come from the Zhangzhou region, as they are the ones that settled in Penang. But I guess we will never know ;)
We're so mixed in the Caribbean, I think we don't really care what the folks in the countries we're descended from say. We've basically formed our own identity, but even that comes with issues...like colourism.
It doesn't matter who we are, where we go, there will always be those who want to lord it over others through some means or the other. People, I tell you!
Good one, Elizabeth, humour and all.
Sorry, I cannot let you call yourself banana if you understand some mandarin and hokkien :p growing up we only called our friends banana if they don't understand any Chinese language/dialects at all, we all can't read or write in Chinese being in a convent girl school :) nowadays I notice the younger generations do not know the Chinese dialects anymore but they learn mandarin in schools as mostly a second language. Does that make them less banana? I don't think so :) but I must say I don't feel so offended if China was being criticized, I visited there for a month once and has since decided, I still embrace my Chinese heritage in many ways, but we are really no longer the same.... I actually feel more akin to Chinese diasporas around the world, besides my fellow Chinese-Malaysian of course!
On no I am not banana enough to be a banana! 😆
Yes me being offended with China being criticised was a mystery to me, but lately I realise it is more that I am upset over the hypocrisy and unfairness over the critiqcisms more than anything, and that there are lies being printed in Western media about them. I guess as someone who believes in proper journalism ethics this upsets me....cos it reminds me of what we go through in Malaysia as Chinese people, especially during the elections 😅
That's true. I am also aware of the power of the western media and try to also seek more alternative views, although it's tough cause I am limited to the English language, and to some extend the German language, which I seldom read for pleasure. Glad you are one of the voice to speak up and share, in English! :)
You know, former Singaporean diplomat Kishore Mahbubani says that Asians need to speak up more about this issue, and I agree. I do my part point out factual errors and encourage more nuanced thinking. It is tiring but I think if we dont, it is just gonna gwe worse.
I am actually learning to read Mandarin now, and while it is still early days, I really think I would be able to read Chinese social media by next year. Am excited!
The ex was half-Taiwanese. I assume there are slightly different factors at play, but I always wondered if he'd agree to our relationship since I am wholly Filipino (although in Taipei I was mistaken—twice!—for a local).
Of course that's irrelevant now.
Let me see if I understand this correctly - he decided to get into a relationship cos you are not Chinese?
Oh crap, I didn't realize I missed out on a lot of things!
Her father, who had been dead for years when we met.
Okay. There. Hahaha.
hahahaha ok. So I assume your ex was half Filipino?
Yeah, but her dad was based in the Philippines, so she isn't as exposed to Chinese culture (except through her mom, for some reason).
Hah, we have to admit that race is still a thing with parents 😆 Awkward but a reality!
That's a killer last line!!!
Also yes, agree with Rachel in the earlier comments that speaking Chinese really unbanana-fies one haha. I grew up in HK but I was a bit of a banana too as I spoke Cantonese terribly growing up (English-ed and everything) and only now at work having to converse in the language daily and gaining proficiency I've shed that skin (or rather... my pulp has yellowed??).
Speaking of hometowns, I had the exact same conversation with my dad!!! He literally just said "somewhere in Fujian" when I asked where our ancestors were from and it was only when we went back to Malaysia for Ching Ming this year did we note the exact hometown marked on the gravestones. I write about this heritage as told by fishballs over here (https://slowburnliving.substack.com/p/fishballs-a-cultural-history-and?r=2v43lk) feel free to drop by if you're interested!