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Kendra Bork's avatar

It's so nice to see others who are tired of the outrage culture. Frankly, it's exhausting. I've found a few writers that I've lost touch with hidden over here on Substack, so it's a bit like coming home in a way. I'm also finding new voices like yours who speak to our shared humanity and beautiful differences, both that are worth celebrating. Thank you for this!

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Elizabeth Tai's avatar

Thank you for commenting. I think it's through comments that I'm finding kindred spirits too. Let's celebrate what makes humanity beautiful together :)

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Simon K Jones's avatar

I could almost feel you being happier while writing this. ;)

Thing is - if you start writing stuff that is more meaningful to you, even if some of it is difficult, I'm willing to bet that what you return to fiction you'll find yourself able to write an entirely new kind of fiction. That connects more directly to who you are. Which will make it not only easier and more satisfying to write, but will probably also connect with readers even more as well.

As Shalom says, it doesn't have to be a zero sum thing. Write what you want, and if that happens to include fiction at some point down the line, then great!

Back in 2021/2022 I stressed a lot about my newsletter being a bit of a muddle. I had my scifi serial, but I also had a blog about writing, and then I wanted to write reviews of things I like, and then I thought about doing video tutorials...and they all felt like different audiences. Then I realised that what I really wanted to do was write for a very specific audience called Me, and that it didn't really matter if it made sense from a BRAND STRATEGY point of view.

Turns out, as soon as I stopped worrying and just wrote stuff I love writing about, people started showing up to read it.

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Elizabeth Tai's avatar

Oh your story sounds so much like what I'm going through now. It's tough to "stick to a common topic" when you desire so much to write something else badly. And you're right, I am much happier thinking about what I'm going to write for 2024, though I am also nervous about it, not sure if I'll do it well. I've always been reluctant to write about my culture, roots etc, so it'll force me to go deep into myself.

But yeah, that feels like the right thing to do despite how intimidating it is.

"I stopped worrying and just wrote stuff I love writing about, people started showing up to read it." --> you should put this on a T-Shirt!

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Shalom Auslander's avatar

Just a thought, Elizabeth - perhaps instead of saying you don't want to write fiction, say you don't want to write fiction now. At this moment. Next year, who knows? Follow the fun. I write fiction, non-fiction, plays when I'm sick of prose, essays when I'm bored with plays. I could never do just one. Good luck.

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Elizabeth Tai's avatar

Weirdly enough I never thought of that hahaha. I'm just such a dogged perfectionist at times. That's a great tip.

PS: Loved your latest issues btw. Thanks for writing them. I feel less alone thinking the same thing.

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Elle Griffin's avatar

I'm going through a similar exploration with my writing. I used to think I wanted to be a novelist, but now I don't think I do. (I have a post coming out about this this week!) I love writing in such a way that I can explore and think through various ideas. Sometimes I explore those ideas in fiction and sometimes in nonfiction, but I don't need to pick one or the other. I can just explore! To let myself pick up the piece I want to work on is the greatest joy, no matter what it is!

Thank you for such a beautiful post Elizabeth! I'm with you, let's be the beauty we want to see on the internet!

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Elizabeth Tai's avatar

> I used to think I wanted to be a novelist, but now I don't think I do. (I have a post coming out about this this week!) I love writing in such a way that I can explore and think through various ideas.

I'm SO looking forward to your post. This is hilarious, but I have the same exact post in my drafts with the title: Maybe I should quit writing fiction. LOL. But since I wasn't sure if I should quit fiction it is still in drafts. I do want to write fiction, but not at the focus and volume I'm trying to force myself to do right now.

Like you, I love exploring and thinking through ideas. I realise as well, that there aren't many essayists in South-East Asia. It is trendier to write fiction. (whispers fiction exploring the pain of being Asian, which I sardonically call 'sad stories about Asians', because the Western pubs loves them and gives awards to people who do.

Yes, let's be the highlighters of beauty on the Internet. So many people are doing the opposite already. This is a niche market lol.

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Elle Griffin's avatar

The crazy thing is, despite how prized fiction is literarily, people just don't read it the way they read essays. So if you're craving writing essays, as I am, well they'll be much better read and more popular anyway. 🥰

In any case, it sounds like we need your kind of essays to tip the scales on South-East Asian writing!!! That adding some beauty to the internet is niche is so sad. But we can do our best to change that haha!

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Samuél Lopez-Barrantes's avatar

Thanks for the kind words, Elizabeth. After two years on this platform, I can genuinely say that doing you is all that really matters ... scalability is such a crock of shite when it comes to actual, real-life human connections. Nobody in the world that I know of who's happy in their interpersonal relationships has 25, let alone 100, or 1,000, or 10,000 profound connections. Sticking to what makes us *us" as writers is the most surefire north star that I know of at this point in my life.

It reminds me of a George Saunders story about how after he finished his first novel, which he was convinced was a masterpiece, he saw his wife reading the manuscript late at night, shaking her head. Disillusioned with himself, the next day at work he start writing literary doodles during some boring corporate meeting. The next night, he heard his wife laughing as she read these seemingly inconsequential doodles. Lo and behold, those doodles became short stories, which would soon become CivilWarLand in Bad Decline. The rest is literary history.

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Elizabeth Tai's avatar

> The next night, he heard his wife laughing as she read these seemingly inconsequential doodles.

This descries me perfectly. What I want to write, I deem "valueless" and "nothing better than doodles" so I forced myself to write something else. This is great perspective. I will do this, and I do want to look up George Saunders now.

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Samuél Lopez-Barrantes's avatar

Oh, where the value feels worthless is usually where the heart is beating under it in my experience. I highly recommend "Tenth of December" (short story collection). Here's a paraphrased link of the above story:

https://www.driverlesscrocodile.com/books-and-recommendations/george-saunders-a-hill-of-ones-own/

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